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Dantasy Basketball League Season Preview -- Meet the Managers, Rosters, Season Predictions

Updated: Oct 21

As heavily requested by Commissioner Danzo Bower, today's blog will be a preview of the basketball league the people really care about -- The DBL. If you're unfamiliar, this is our Fantasy Basketball League comprised of 12 elite ball knowledge experts (well, 11 ball knowers and 1 Tom's Two Cents) competing and vying for the ever elusive DBL Championship trophy. This is only my 2nd season as a DBL Manager -- and while I do fear being removed if I take too many shots at Commish -- the show must go on.


In this blog I will be giving you a breakdown of our league -- Commissioner Bower has put together bios for the 12 managers, which you can see in the @DantasyBasketballLeague Post (go follow) -- and I will be giving you a snapshot of their Rosters (it cut out the last pick for each team -- check the DBL IG for those) and their strengths and weaknesses.


And at the end, I will give my Season Predictions for the DBL -- complete with Playoff Predictions, a Champion, and almost more importantly -- a LOSER.


Before we meet the managers -- a quick breakdown of roster construction in the DBL:

  • 1x Point Guard

  • 1x Shooting Guard

  • 1x Small Forward

  • 1x Power Forward

  • 1x Center

  • 1x Guard (PG/SG)

  • 1x Forward (SF/PF/C)

  • 3x Utilities (any position)

  • 4x Bench slots

  • 3x IR spots (hurt players/players OUT for a game can move to IR)


Meet the Managers


The East


Danny Bower - Manager of "Hairy VaGiannis"


Roster (in Draft order)
4th overall pick
ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Generating buzz and inspiring League Activity

  • Graphic design and AI utilization for DBL Socials

  • Low Post-Presence/Rebounding

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Forming true sentences and relying solely on #'s

  • League Office Availability on Holidays

  • Reliable and Consistent Guard Play


The Founder and Commissioner of this great league enters the season with lofty expectations. He had the best record at 15-5 in the regular season, but stumbled in the semis, finishing in 3rd place. After an offseason of work passing new rules, growing the DBL Social presence, and implementing ex-Dansion to 12 teams -- Commissioner Bower has set the stage for a great season. But can he exercise his demons from last year and get back to a Title Game?


Eli Dodd - Manager of "Giddey aka Holliday Hunter"


Roster (in Draft order)
1st overall pick

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Manager's Strengths:
  • Luck -- got the #1 overall pick and Jokic this season

  • Relentless on the Waiver Wire

  • Dynamic off the bounce on the rec court

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Reliant on Star Power

  • Offseason rule passed to limit weekly acquisitions

  • Shooting %'s on the rec court


The reigning runner-up of the DBL, GM Dodd has a target on his back entering the 2025-2026 season -- at least from the Commish after eliminating him last year. After a 2nd place finish last season due to intense and relentless waiver wire focus — Dodd showed his ability to grind out W’s. Lavar Ball gifted him the #1 overall pick to claim Joker this season. Can Dodd breakthrough to another Championship appearance, or will the offseason changes limit his success?


Noah Fahnestock - Manager of "Suggs My Balls"


Roster (in Draft order)
12th overall pick

ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Well-balanced and experienced roster construction

  • Proven track-record of DBL success

  • The Law -- DBL's finest (and only) attorney

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • 12th overall pick led to lack of star power

  • Potentially over reliant on players in the Eastern Conference

  • Duke Fan -- fucking disgusts me


Noah Fahnestock Esquire -- a veteran of the DBL and perennial threat to win the league every time he joins up. 12-8 and finishing 4th overall last year, his eyes are set on capturing a championship in 2025-2026. He comes in with a very different roster this year, but was able to acquire Tyrese Maxey who was high on his priority list. Will the league's newest Attorney take the rest of the league to Trial this year?


Sam Spivey - Manager of "Herro Ball"


Roster (in Draft order)
9th overall pick

ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Strong backcourt pieces

  • CPA -- master of working around the salary cap

  • Summer of travel to center himself before the season's grind

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Lack of frontcourt depth

  • Injuries entering the season could cause slow start

  • Lack of success in our Fantasy Football League could carry over


Manager Sam Spivey is a sleeping giant with the potential for a big season. Spivey has the most dangerous group of guards on paper with Trae Young, Steph Curry, Darius Garland, Ja Morant, and Tyler Herro when he returns from injury -- which could be packaged for frontcourt help via trade as needed. After an 8-12 record last season, he has his eyes set on a Championship. But much like his PL Team Arsenal -- will finishing Runner-up be this team's ceiling?


Jack Ache - Manager of "Mickey Mouse Ring Chasers"


Roster (in Draft order)
7th overall pick

ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Young star power with proven track records

  • High-upside late round picks

  • Elite Vibes, Heart of Gold

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Injury history to frontcourt, lack of rebounding in the frontcourt

  • Betting on some former stars to return to relevance

  • East coast time-zone hinders ball-watching hours (I'm in the same boat, it blows)


The vibes guy of the DBL -- Jam Master Ache brings an elite combination of ball knowledge and comedy that is needed in this League. He had a strong season last year at 11-9, a 5th place finish, and playoff berth. This is a roster with plenty or firepower -- his top 2 picks can score at a high level and his middle picks are stat-sheet stuffers. PG and Brad Beal having resurgent seasons could be the difference for Ache's squad -- but will they continue their woes from 24-25?

(Also fuck you for sniping me on Scottie Barnes and Brandon Miller).


Tommy Rupp - Manager of "Getting Toppin"


Roster (in Draft order)
11th overall pick

ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Fresh perspective allows outside-the-box thought process

  • Activist for Managerial rights in the DBL

  • Star Power on the roster**

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Lacks the deep-cut, personnel knowledge

  • A complete and utter hatred for NBA basketball

  • Star Power on the roster -- **if injuries were turned off and it was 2019.


The final team in the Eastern Conference is an Expansion Roster led by Tom Rupp -- better known as Tom's Two Cents here at Bean's Blog. Tom comes into the season with the lowest expectations of any manager -- his NBA Knowledge is about as deep as a Kiddie Pool. But he also may be able to catch team's off-guard -- especially if Lebron can return soon. Can he win enough games to clinch the Playoffs in a Loaded East, or will he be out of contention by the All-Star Break?


The West


Luke Loewenstein - Manager of "Knueppel Twister"


Roster (in Draft order)
8th overall pick

ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Active on the waiver wire

  • Prioritized stat-sheet stuffing over star-power

  • Strong rebounding team from frontcourt to backcourt

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Trying to play as many people as possible can lead to bad drops

  • Lack of star power may limit big scoring performances

  • Reliance on strong performers in 24-25 that may not improve


This one's me so I'll keep it brief -- I got fucking skoned out of a playoff spot last year despite finishing 10-10. I work the wire, I maximize the roster, I compete. If I can avoid injuries, I'll be a playoff team guaranteed -- even if Lavar Ball cucked me out of a Top-6 pick.

**Full disclosure - I don't love my roster. Sabonis got a hip injury right after we drafted, so really banking on a Franz bounce-back, MPJ to average 20+, Ausar to make a leap, and Harden to stay healthy.


Logan Jenkins - Manager of "Makin Me NembHard"


Roster (in Draft order)
6th overall pick

ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Reigning Champion of the DBL

  • Built a well-rounded roster with Star Power

  • Beating Dodd in the Championship gave him the Crown of Best real-life Hooper in the League as well

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Reliant on the 3-5 position with a shallow group of guards

  • Kyrie will take up an IR spot all season, another injury or 2 could limit add/drops

  • If his gambling plays are any indicator, could be a long season


The reigning champion of the DBL -- no manager enters the season with higher expectations than Logan. At 12-8, he rode the momentum of a strong end to the season all the way to the Finals. This season, he brings back one of his stars from last year in Cade Cunningham, and has built a team with lots of size and shooting around him. Can Leeroy start a Dynasty in KC, or is the freshly engaged man a one-hit wonder?

(Also fuck you Logan you sniped me so hard on Bam and Nembhard it made me sick).


Davin Dorrell - Manager of "Sir This Is A Wemby's"


Roster (in Draft order)
3rd overall pick

ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Sniped Commish on Wemby 100% -- Love that

  • Lots of veterans with proven ability to produce

  • Good amount of positional versatility

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Those veterans -- they old-old -- how do they hold up?

  • Question marks in the backcourt with efficiency and health

  • Will the Rat Wheel keep him from reaching his full potential?


The Silent Assasin, Davo Dorrell is coming for heads this season. He proved he has no concern for the opposition on Draft Night when he sniped Wemby right before Danzo's pick -- and Wemby could be a league winner if healthy. Health and Age are my only concerns with this roster -- but Davo's got the stars to win the whole thing. After a strong debut season in the DBL -- Can the Big Names carry him to the Big One?


Ty Valentine - Manager of "Sarr Wars and Bookers. Amen!"


Roster (in Draft order)
10th overall pick

ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Mix of Vets and Young Potential

  • Balanced roster positionally

  • Will never lose an argument about his team (even if he's wrong)

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Loaded up on older players late that could see a falloff

  • Volatile middle-round picks are high ceiling, but low floor

  • Conspiracies in this political climate may steer focus away from ball


Lord Tylo Ren, master of the tin-foil wrapped router and owner of the front row on a volleyball court -- he's looking for a bounce-back season in Year 2 of the DBL. A 9th placed finish in an injury-riddled season is not what he was hoping for, but Ty's a shrewd manager more than capable of bouncing back. With a high-upside young star in Amen Thompson, plenty of vets and shooting -- Ty may be in store for a comeback player of the year type season.


Colin Lombardi - Manager of "Seng Nudes"


Roster (in Draft order)
5th overall pick

ree

Manager's Strengths:
  • Loaded up on young talent

  • Limited expectations after a year from hell last season

  • Best dap-ups in the game -- master motivator

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • Limited amount of established producers at the NBA Level

  • Last place last season -- bad luck or managerial problems?

  • Those first 3 picks... a little racist if you ask me #ThisLeague


Sir Lombardicus, 1st of his name, Champion of Parlays, but Loser of Leagues -- Colin is another manager with a chip on his shoulder in 2025-2026. After a 4-16 year, dealing with injuries and production fall-off for key players, Lombardi has his sights set on the playoffs this season. He built a young, athletic, well-rounded roster from the #5 slot -- the question remains whether he can work the waiver wire well-enough to secure regular season wins.


David Grant - Manager of "Westward Expansion"


Roster (in Draft order)
5th overall pick

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Manager's Strengths:
  • Loaded up on players with Championship pedigree early

  • Lot of backcourt darts to throw in the later rounds with upside

  • Loyalty and Commitment to his teams (A Bears' fan who's never faltered)

Manager's Weaknesses:
  • New to the Fantasy Basketball world -- will be a learning curve

  • No manager will take him lightly -- will get everyone's best

  • Will the Bear's 4-2 start deter his focus early season?

    • Once they fall off and are 4-7, surely he'll lock in


The Final Manager to Meet is another Rookie to the DBL -- but one you'd be a fool to take lightly. David Grant, better known as DG, is a force to be reckoned with on the gridiron, field, court -- you name it. While he's new to the league, he brings a deep bag of ball knowledge and a work ethic that never quits. When he's not buried in spreadsheets at work, he's buried in metrics and match-up analytics (and muff). Can DG take Westward Expansion all the way to a Ship?


Season Predictions


Now's for the fun part -- where I make my season predictions just for them to be thrown back in my face in the group-chat when I'm inevitably off. But these are simply my off-the-cuff reactions to the draft day rosters -- if I rank you low, it probably means you're destined for a Championship. I'm also not doing real math to make sure it's the same amount of wins and losses -- just going off vibes and picking records.


The East


  1. Giddey aka Holliday Hunter (Dodd) -- 15-5
  2. Hairy VaGiannis (Commish Danzo) -- 13-7
  3. Mickey Mouse Ring Chasers (Ache) -- 11-9
  4. Suggs My Balls (Fahney) -- 10-10
  5. Getting Toppin (Rupp) -- 7-13
  6. Herro Ball (Spivey) -- 6-14

Dodd will ride the Jokic-express all the way to a 1-seed in a loaded Eastern Conference. High assist and rebound role players, Brunson with his huge scoring nights, and a statistical breakout on a bad Suns team from Jalen Green will be the kicker for this squad.

Commish Bower is always a threat, and with his 3-headed-monster of bigs in Giannis-Paolo-Mobley -- this team's going to put up numbers, and he'll work the wire for the necessary points for 12+ wins. Ache edges out Fahney with a more dynamic scoring 1-2 combo in ANT-Don over Siakam-Maxey, but both are playoff hopefuls in my eyes.

Rupp is the popular pick for last place based on Draft Night -- but I think he's going to shock some people this year (by not going 2-18). If AD stays healthy, and if Bron and Fox can get healthy, this could be a sneaky squad. Spivey's squad is very strong at the Guard positions, and I love Jalen Johnson as a bounce-back candidate -- but think health and lack of rebounding/blocks could bite him.


The West


  1. Knueppel Twister (Me) -- 20-0
  2. Makin Me NembHard (Jenkins) -- 14-6
  3. Sir This Is A Wemby's (Davo) -- 12-8
  4. Westward Expansion (DG) -- 10-10
  5. Seng Nudes (Lombardi) -- 9-11 (never forget)
  6. Sarr Wars and Bookers. Amen! (Tylo) -- 5-15

Gave Tylo an extra three losses simply for making me type out that long dumbass team name. I don't hate any squads in the West and think we may be a strong conference roster-wise this year, but questions surround our managers.

For obvious reasons -- elite roster construction, elite waiver wire management, elite ball knowledge -- I'd be shocked to see Knueppel Twister lose a game this year. And damnit is he a handsome lad!

Would be disrespectful to put the reigning champ any lower -- Logan's a veteran with a well-rounded roster built for the ploffs -- especially if Kyrie makes it back late season. Davo crawled into the playoffs last year and has the most star power in the league -- we'll see how those aging stars produce, but Wemby should be enough to claim a spot.

Then it came down to DG and Lombo -- new blood vs wily vet. I like both rosters, I think Lombo may have a slightly deeper unit. But I'm scarred by his struggles last year, and this is a big "let me see it for myself" year. DG is the unknown entity -- and I always like to bet on a dark horse. DG is the Golden State Valkyries of DBL expansion -- he'll make some noise and sneak in.


Playoff Predictions:


Format for our playoffs with #ExDansion is 8 teams make it -- which I personally think is soft, but anything to give my boys a higher chance of making their mark. Starting with the Losers:


Poo-Playoffs:
#9 Seed - Seng Nudes (Lombo)
#10 Seed - Getting Toppin (Tom)
#11 Seed - Herro Ball (Spivey)
#12 Seed - Sarr Wars and Bookers. Amen! (Ty)

#11 Herro Ball over #10 Getting Toppin
#9 Seng Nudes over #12 Sarr Wars and Bookers. Amen!

#12 Sarr Wars and Bookers. Amen! over #10 Getting Toppin

Unfortunately for Tom, after just narrowly falling short of a playoff berth, he runs into some Poo-Playoff buzzsaws and takes last in his inaugural DBL Season. Capped by early-season injuries and lack of managerial wisdom on the waiver wire, it's back to the drawing board in the offseason.


#1 Seed - Knueppel Twister (Me)
#2 Seed - Giddey aka Holliday Hunter (Dodd)
#3 Seed - Makin Me NembHard (Logan)
#4 Seed - Hairy VaGiannis (Danzo)
#5 Seed - Sir This Is A Wemby's (Davo)
#6 Seed - Mickey Mouse Ring Chasers (Ache)
#7 Seed - Suggs My Balls (Fahney)
#8 Seed - Westward Expansion (DG)

Round 1:
#1 Knueppel Twister over #8 Westward Expansion
#4 Hairy VaGiannis over #5 Sir This Is A Wemby's
#6 Mickey Mouse Ring Chasers over #3 Makin Me NembHard
#7 Suggs My Balls over #2 Giddey aka Holliday Hunter

Splashy upsets from the Western Conference -- Fahney and Ache get big W's to advance to the semis due to no-show series' from Jalen Brunson and Cade Cunningham. Commish advances to the semis once again to face the juggernaut Knueppel Twister, who ends expansion upstart DG's year early.


Semi-Finals:
#4 Hairy VaGiannis over #1 Knueppel Twister
#7 Suggs My Balls over #6 Mickey Mouse Ring Chasers

The Knueppels take their first loss of the season in the Final 4 -- much like Kon Knueppel's Duke Team choking away their shot in the Final 4 to Houston last year. Suggs My Balls gets a monster series from Derrick White and Ace Bailey -- who's come into form as a 25 ppg scorer -- to clip the Mickey Mouse Ring Chasers. Setting up a Rivalry Match for the DBL Crown.


Finals:
#7 Suggs My Balls over #4 Hairy VaGiannis

In truly poetic fashion, Commish exercises his Semi-final demons from last year, only to lose to Western Conference rival Fahney. The Cinderella Run is capitalized by a dominant series from the Bridges' Bros (not actually brothers) who lift Fahney to a DBL Finals Championship Trophy.


If you made it this far -- leave a like and comment below or on the Instagram post who YOU think will win the DBL this season, and more importantly, which manager will finish in last place.





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